I'm totally Back!

But not really? I mean, I'm back in Kamloops, but I'm not sure where I am mentally. Probably here...but there are so many little (but not so little) things that I'm supposed to get sorted out that I'm not exactly feeling grounded.

I'm supposed to find a job. Being a nurse, you'd think this would be easy. Finding a job that fits into my perception of what the job needs to be is harder. I want something for the summer. I'm going away for several weeks in the fall, so I need to be able to get mucho time off then. So, "just" a summer job rather than a job that expects me to stay for the rest of my life (or at least 8-12 months)? In nursing, this is waaay hard, expecially seeing that I'm a new nurse with pretty much no experience. This means that people are willing to train me. But how bad is that to go through weeks of training and then just leave? BAH. I'm trying to get this job at an old folks home in Ontario. I tried there last year but they told me that they don't hire for the summer. Then one of my mom's friends - who nurses there - emailed her this: "hey, is Sarah done school yet? Knollcrest is looking for nursing students for the summer?" This sentence confuses me because how could I fit into that job as a graduate nurse if I'm supposed to be a nursing student? But I'm going to ask anyway.

I'm supposed to get a car. I have no money because I don't really have a job. Well, I have a job, but it's not nursing, and it pays me 1/2 of what I should be making as a nurse.

Dance recital. That's in a week and a 1/2. In the fall semester of dance class, I've missed 9 weeks. I'm just trying not to look too much like a fool. Plus I still have yet to make my costume.

RN Exam. I haven't studied. My degree program has been preparing me for this for the pas 4 years, and I haven't picked up a book yet. I'm not totally scared, because I'm pretty confident in the answers I had in the practice book....but maybe I should be? 20 days left until I write it.

I've got some clutter I need to clean up. Laundry to fold, travel trinkets to put away....doesn't seem like it should be a stressor because I haven't had anyone call me to work yet so I spend a lot of time a home....but I don't like spending entire days in my basement bedroom with no real natural light. Plus I'm a little lazy.

I owe money. Not just my visa, or my impending $12, 000 student loan (which in the big picture isn't that big) but after this trip I just had, I owe some people come serious cabbage. Vegas doesn't pay for itself....(neither does Roswell, or San Diego, or Los Angeles.....)

I'm sure I'll be OK. I just feel better letting some of that out. Maybe if I can see it, I can make tickey-boxes to check off each one when they're over....

One thing I did complete, though, was a pretty power-point presentation outlining my entire western US trip. It'll be burned onto CD and mailed for the people I can't bring my flash drive to.